Email buyjugs [at] videocy.com buy the jugs. Only two jugs are available, so don't wait!
Here they are, the stars of Nice Big Jugs, the Opera. On sale!
This story is very truthy . . .
. . . . I've owned these jugs for 30 years now and I just don't have space for 'em anymore, so they're on sale. If you live in a normal amount of space (not a Manhattan studio apartment) they're a great decoration and conversation piece. Filling them up with your favorite potent potable and chugging the stuff is not recommended. I've never known where to get straws long enough for these puppies.
Holiday Jugs?
Yup, thos holidays are coming up. Wouldn'y you love to see Santa try to get these jugs down your chimney? Mail me at buyjugs [at] videocy.com if you want to come by and see them.
Big Jugs Lawsuit
According to Ananova.com, a German woman went to the hospital to have wrinkles removed - and woke up with bigger breasts.
Ingrid Bruelling, 33, said she wanted firmer skin and fewer wrinkles after losing over 200 lbs on a diet.
But when she woke up after the operation she found doctors had put two silicone implants into her breasts, increasing their size from a C cup to a D.
Doctors said the woman should not complain as the best way to tighten the skin and remove the wrinkles was to make her breasts bigger.
So! The solution to those annoying wrinkles? Nice Big Jugs!
Jimmy Kimmel
Anybody know how I could get this to Jimmy Kimmel? This is his kind of material.
Lyric
Nice Big Jugs
If you couldn't make out the lyrics of the song as I sang them . . . count your blessings. If you're still interested, here they are:
(To the tune When I Was a Lad I Served a Term from HMS Pinafore, Music by Sir Arthur Sullivan)
When I was a sailor off to sea,
My ship made port in Naples Italy.
I spent my money when I went a shore,
On the biggest jugs I’d ever seen before!
|: THERE’S NOTHING MORE THAT A SAILOR LOVES
THAN KNOWING THAT HE OWNS A PAIR OF NICE BIG JUGS! :|
When from the Navy I was free,
I went and joined an opera company.
I kept my jugs, which might seem strange,
But nothing next to what you often see on stage.
|: THERE’S NOTHING MORE THAT A SINGER LOVES
THAN KNOWING THAT HE OWNS A PAIR OF NICE BIG JUGS! :|
Now it’s your turn, now you can win,
This nice big jug and its identical twin!
What other way could you have jugs
So big without taking those illegal drugs?
|: THERE’S NOTHING MORE THAT YOU’LL EVER LOVE
THAN KNOWING THAT YOU OWN A PAIR OF NICE BIG JUGS! :|
Bill Dyszel was the perpetrator of these lyrics. He is entirely to blame.
Stumble It!